Onward!
by Sweetums128neo
Summary: ZADR Can't really think of a summary, but it's a roleplay between my friend and I. Been beta'd and everything to read like a story. Be my guest, and come read. It'd make me happy. It's sexyyy ! *OBEY THE ZADR!*
1. Chapter 1

Dib's pencil scritched along the paper, though recording nothing of the current subject he was in. No, no, it was... **aliens**! After all these years, and all the ridicule, he hadn't given up on it. Sure, everybody still thought he was crazy. But more than that, in high school, he'd become quite the outcast. Nobody believed him, still... determined to stop Zim, but the attempts had narrowed down to not so often.

His clothes were pretty much the same, trench coat and boots... his shirt had a UFO on it, though. It was five minutes until class got out, he eagerly awaited the bell, stuffing the paper in his backpack.

While said paper was being stuffed into said backpack, another one soared across the room to land upon the desk of the Membrane child. A growl was heard, before a barrage of paper balls flew at Dib, all missing save one, as it bounced off his oddly jutting hair, and it too wilted forward. There was a loud snicker before a green-skinned teen spazzed out, thrusting his fists into the air.

"VICTORY! VICTORY FOR ZIM!!" His black and brown "hair" fell into his face, as he pushed it to the side with a sleeve-covered hand. The pin-straight locks fell back in his face, and he growled, trying to not rip this wig off. Shaking his head the wig righted itself, before he swept his glance around the classroom. A few kids stared, ones new to the skool district, but mostly everyone stared at the clock. (It was funny how easily he had become a permanent fixture in the system).

Satisfied he had not been spotted, or really cared about for that matter, he straightened out the white long-sleeved undershirt he wore, trying to take out the wrinkles in his red-cotton short-sleeved button up. He saw no reason to sit as the skool bell would ring soon, so he scooped his back pack up, fitting it over his refurnished Pak--it was now white with deep red paneling--as the chains on his dark red Tripp pants jingled (something about the jingling called to Zim). Dark brown eyes glared at Dib as he stuck out his thin, pointed tongue.

He glared at his alien rival, and adjusted his glasses. Dib rubbed his head a little, those kind of hurt... but it was just regular behavior for the alien, as always. Though he wanted to yell out something about Zim being an alien, that had grown old long ago. Still, one more time couldn't hurt. Standing up on his chair, he got that crazed look in his eyes and pointed dramatically at Zim, his trench coat sleeve rolling back to his elbow a bit. "ALIEN!!" he proclaimed, his arm starting to shake.

The kids merely scoffed, before more paper was thrown at Dib, this time by other students. Mostly they glared or snickered, while again the people who were new were filled in about how crazy Dib was. Zim smirked, happy enough to let the other earth-monkeys do his bidding for him. Laughing under his breath, antennas twitched underneath the wig before he bolted out of the classroom. Ugh...only fourth period. He didn't think he'd get through the day.

Giving an almighty sigh and knowing fully well that nobody would care, he skittered off towards the teacher's lounge. Near it was a set of stairs that he normally hid under until he felt like going back to class; he had no parents for them to call so they usually let Zim do as he pleased.

Dib, having used to kids throwing paper and other odd objects, didn't take this too personally at all. Removing wads of paper stuck in his hair, he brushed them all off. That made kind of a little ring of crumpled up paper around his desk. Not that much in a hurry when the bell rang, he was a little curious as to what Zim was up to. It never died his curiosity for the green-skinned one. I mean, how can somebody /_miss_/ that?! Shoving his hands into his trench coat pockets, Dib took in a breath and did his best to try and remember where Zim usually hid. Not having any luck, and the time for passing through the halls thinning, he decided to be a goody two-shoes and go to class. What a disappointment.

Zim watched Dib pass by his spot three times before he saw the human sigh and run off to class. Zim laughed long and hard after that, even though it really wasn't all that funny...well to him it was. I mean c'mon, he was sure the Dib-human could /_smell_/ him, knowing that's how creepy the earthling tended to get.

Tempted to lean against the wall but thinking he'd better save his Pak some pain, Zim pulled out a notebook and doodled, mostly containing him squishing humans or gnawing on Dib's scythe. That damn thing always annoyed the hell out of him, and he really wanted some days just to jump Dib and gnaw the stupid thing off. He wondered if that's what kept his ham-filled mind cavity going...

Dib rested his head on his palm, and his elbow rested on the desk. He glared down at his paper, rolling the pencil that was near it around. Back and forth, back and forth. This sort of bothered him, as always, he was just too paranoid about things. 'Any day now, any day now, he's going to catch you off-guard!' his brain told him. It told him all sorts of things like that; he already knew they were all true.

He had to get out of class. To use the bathroom, that's all. It wasn't to find Zim. Nope. Wondering if the old 'pencil-up-nose' trick would work, he broke the writing utensil in half and shoved it up his nose, raising his hand shortly after that.

The female teacher stopped in her tracks, as she had been going on about a rather good rant about the government, before she had seen the hand go up. Looking irritated beyond belief, she stared hard before asking irritatedly, "Dib, what is it now? If you're going to suggest that theory the government is run by ducks and not my obviously believable theory that it's run by gorillas, then you can put your hand down now."

Dib kind of blinked, not expecting that response. His hand lowered and he pointed to his nose, with the eraser-side of the pencil was seemingly lodged into. "I have... this pencil stuck in my nose." he eased the question out, as it started to slide out and h e quickly replaced it back in his nostril. With a cheesy grin he looked up at the teacher, placing his hands together innocently. Real smooth, Dib. Real smooth.

The teacher seemed a little relieved before she nodded. "Again? Dib you really need to learn that pencils belong either on your desk or behind your ear." She gave a heavy sigh, moving forward slightly to peer at his nose, squinting slightly. "Tell me how far in your brain is it this time Dib?"

"It's... pretty far." He replied, and winced for the effect when he tried to wiggle it. Looking up at the teacher, he tried to put on his best 'I'm-in-pain-with-a-fucking-pencil-up-my-nose' look, and so far he thought it was working. In his head at least, his brain yelled at him to never really try to lodge anything into it.

She stared, long and hard as if she could figure out weather or not he was lying. Leaning back she shrugged. "Fine, go to the nurse. But unless you're going to go comatose, come back to class right away understand?" Pulling a pencil from behind her ear--she gave Dib a pointed look--a pass was written out before she handed it to the teen. "Go. Quickly."

Dib smiled and took the pass, walking out the door. When it was shut behind him, he removed the pencil from his nostril chucked it to the side. Ewww, it had Dib boogers on it, just for the unlucky person who was going to find it next. He hesitated for a moment, trying to decide whether to go left or right. Left couldn't hurt. It wasn't right, but just because it was right didn't mean it was right. He mentally slapped himself for that pun and darted down the hall, shoving the pass in his pocket for later use.

Zim had long dozed off in his small warm corner of the stairway; it's not like he was tired, sleeping just passed the time best. No Irken needed this stupid thing called sleep. He had curled up on a blanket he had stashed away in his Pak, plus a pillow for his head. He had fallen asleep after the first bell for the fifth period sounded, so he would sleep until sixth block, which happened to be mechanics. Ooh...so many shiny objects to play with when he woke up...

The boy huffed along, he'd ran practically everywhere around school. That's when it hit him: Zim's hiding place! The stairway! 'Took you long enough', his brain told him, and he headed in that direction. Wasting no time Dib was at the stairway, leaning down to rest his elbows on his knees to catch his breathe.

There he was, finally he had Zim where he wanted him. That sneaky bastard thought he could get away! Well, nobody can escape from Dib! He snickered at his own muses, and crouched down to peer under the stairway. And in fact, there the alien was. He held out his camera, the shutter clicked a couple of times.

The sound did not wake the Irken, merely forced a few annoyed noises from the back of his throat as he rolled over, now facing Dib. He muttered a few things in Irken, some loose English slipping through involving the words "Muffin", "Pig", "Toaster", "Gir", and "Explosives".

Dib was convinced that this was part of Zim's evil master plan and the shutter clicked again, he put his magical camera away and adjusted his glasses. He scooted a little closer and had his handy dandy noteboo-- I mean, notepad, and… "Shit, I don't have a pencil!" Dib said aloud, searching his pockets. So much for the plan of writing notes about what Zim said in his sleep!

That, however, had the Irken awake. Giving a growl, with fake eyes still closed, he picked up the pillow and swatted at Dib. Giving a satisfied noise when he felt the plush material hit Dib with a muffled "bop", he placed it down and let his still wig-covered head back onto the pillow. Not even five seconds went by before his eyes snapped open, brown shooting up to look at Dib before a metal arm came out instinctively to swat Dib from underneath the stairway. Zim growled out, the arm retracting, "Go get your own hiding spot, Dib-stain."

That all happened too quickly for Dib's brain to process. Maybe it was out to lunch. However he blinked and got up, brushing himself off. "I know what you're up to, Zim!" he accused, his... accusing finger out and pointing again to the alien. "You think you're so clever," he said and tried to taunt Zim, slipping the camera from his pocket and waving it back and forth. 'Ooh, very intimidating, Dib.' his brain said. "I have pictures!" he claimed. 'Really, what good are pictures of a green-skinned teenager sleeping going to do?'

"Oh really?" Zim replied. "And what are pictures of a perfectly normal-looking teen skipping a class and sleeping going to do for you?" Zim's brain seemed to be going in the same direction as Dib's rational brain was. Far opposite of Dib's other half, the brain that wasn't so rational.

Zim smirked, grabbing the pillow and blanket, folding them before placing them into his Pak quickly. Moving out from underneath the stairs, he ran into Dib roughly with his shoulder. "Stupid human..."

His mouth turned into a scowl, feeling defeat as he turned to watch Zim. Oh, but this defeat shan't last for long! Victory will be Dib's! Dib started to follow after Zim, trying to keep up with him, running up to the other's side. "Oh, but you don't know what proof I have!" he defended himself. "And you'll never know until it's too late!" he said proudly. 'Oh, Dib, what are you getting yourself into?'

Zim stopped, shooting a glare at the paranormalist with too-large eyes. "I'm sure you do. All this 'mighty'," he provided the physical emphasis, "evidence will surely have Zim captured." A roll of dark brown eyes, letting them land on Dib as they sparked with sarcasm and slightly malicious thoughts. Looking away, he waved his hand about in an enthusiastic way.

"It will, just you wait!" Dib shot back, flailing his arms like a bird trying to take flight. "When you have the FBI knocking at your door, don't come crying to me! You'll see!" he said and huffed angrily. He wanted so bad to be right, all these words just kept coming out of his mouth. 'Think Dib, think.' Dib shook his head and tried to calm down, and made sure his hall pass was still in his pocket. Looking around, he couldn't see a clock. "Hey, do you have a watch on you?" He asked in a casual way, as if nothing happened.

For some stupid reason, his Pak opened tossing Dib a watch. "Here." Deadpanning, he looked back over his shoulder at Dib realizing what he just did. Damnit! Did his brain decide to take a vacation or something? Rustling his wig in annoyance with himself and Dib--mostly Dib--he growled turning back to the other. "Why do you need my timing device hmm?"

He examined the watch, as to make sure it wouldn't explode, or shoot ink at him or anything. Seeing the time, his attention turned to the green-skinned teen. "I just needed the time, that's all." Dib said one eye narrow. 'Well, it's natural of him to be suspicious of you.' Dib didn't really look too suspicious... or did he?

The Dib-human always looked suspicious, and Zim approached the human snatching back his watch and throwing it into his Pak. He stared for a long moment, finally tilting his head upward slightly to see Dib's face. Zim growled in aggravation, standing on his tip toes, but only coming up another inch or so, Dib still far taller than then other. "Stupid Dib-beast...daring to be taller than Zim..."

Dib laughed at this. "That's be cause aliens are short. Humans are obviously superior." the human smirked, looking down at Zim. Yeah, he was pretty short. Bringing up his hand, he flicked Zim's forehead, just like a bully. He liked being taller; it made him feel good about himself and all that psychiatrist mumbo-jumbo. He never understood why Zim's race were so small... it was funny to him.

"You're like a dwarf," he mocked.

Zim gave a warning growl, eyes narrowing fiercely. Even if he was shorter by inches, the Irken could be intimidating...maybe. He wasn't /_that_/ much shorter than Dib. "I AM NOT SHORT! I am considered freakishly tall on my planet! A GIANT!" His chest puffed out in an arrogant manner. "Where as you are considered incredibly short. I've seen some of the other meat babies your age and they're as tall if not taller than you Dib-stink."

Dib rolled his eyes. "Please, Zim. If you're considered freakishly tall on your planet, your people must be... gnome-like. Gnome-people…. Heh," he mused, laughing a bit. He ignored Zim's body language, crossing his arms and putting his nose into the air. "And even if I am short on this planet, I'm still not as short as you." Dib said. Yep, he thought he was pretty darn clever right now, that he did.

"Bah! My leaders would squish you right now! Puny earth monkey!" he spat. "But they'd have a hard time squishing that big head of yours." Reaching up, he grabbed hold of the scythe lock and tugged on it. "What is this hideous thing anyways? Does it get reception? Or can you detach it and use it as a weapon?" The Irken's eyes suddenly lit up at the possibility, tugging more to see if it came loose. "Uwwwaa...I could use your weapon against you!"

Dib yelled out in surprise. "Hey, that's my hair!!" he exclaimed, arms flailing like a bird again. "Don't make fun of it!" he whined, nobody'd really made fun of his hair before. At least none that he could remember at this moment. He shoved Zim away and put his hands atop his head. "Crazy aliens," he spat quietly. 'Don't get so offended easily, Dib'. He couldn't really help it, though. But after a few seconds of that, he snapped out of it and glared at Zim through his glasses. "Does this really look like a weapon?!" he demanded, one eye twitching as he pointed to his own hair.

Zim stared up at the lock, now having that horrible urge to chew upon it. "Sure, yeah...cactus..." he mumbled, obviously not paying attention. Without thinking, he rose on spider legs before tackling Dib to the ground. Once both landed, Zim pushed Dib to a sitting position before standing over him to gnaw on the piece of hair happily.

Hah! Take that you fake lekku!

Dib felt naturally awkward, he twitched and shuddered all over. It went down his spine; he did his best not to move. He tried to figure out why and what Zim was doing. 'He seems to be chewing on your giant spike of hair.' his brain informed, and Dib blinked. "Zim!" he suddenly shouted. "What the hell are you doing?!" he demanded with frustration, poking furiously at the alien's side.

Zim squeaked, letting go long enough to glare down at him and reply, "Getting revenge," before enclosing sharp teeth over the top part of the scythe lock. Noisily, he made chewing sounds, gnawing and occasionally licking it. It tasted sort of odd but it wasn't as bad and it smelled good too! What wasn't there to like about getting revenge on something that was so...interesting. But ugly. Once more he chomped down loudly, a small purr escaping his chest as gnawed.

Dib didn't know what to do. An alien was chewing on his hair. What would any normal kid do? Wait, he was normal? 'Don't kid yourself, Dib.' He winced.

"Do you have to be so loud about it? That's just gross!" Dib yelled, waving his arms. He crossed them and huffed. "You can stop now. It's not doing anything to me, besides... giving me disgusting alien slobber in my hair."

Zim made a few suckling noises, taking the said alien spit back into his mouth and swallowing, only to pull back coughing horribly. Ack. A strand of hair. Once said hair was freed of his breathing passage, he smirked. "It's doing something duh. Otherwise I would not be chewing upon your fake Lekku."

Dib looked really grossed out and confused. "What's a Lekku?" he asked, the shivers going down his spine and arms just wouldn't stop. Eww, alien spit in his hair!

"Some sort of stoopid alien... thing?" he hesitated to reach up to try and feel his hair. Not feeling up to it, his arms rest at his side, his brain told him to get up. Doing so, he twitched as some excess saliva dripped down onto his ear. This made him freeze and shiver all over, severely grossed out.

Zim snickered loudly. Since there so wasn't anyone around--not that anyone would really notice anyways--he removed the wig. Immediately his lekku sprung up, quite happy to be free in the air. They wiggled slightly, Zim itching them gently before he wiggled them at Dib. "These are my Lekku. They're like those satellite dishes on your head, only far better and more sensitive."

He was trying not to concentrate on the drool going down his ear; it curved down his face, and dripped off his chin. 'Good God that's vile.' Dib turned his attention to Zim; he looked awkwardly stiff, all tensed up. Well, with revenge-inducing spit in your hair, it'd be all gross and slimy and warm and... Yeah. The teen's eyes narrowed. "Right. Did you really have to slobber on me?" he asked pathetically. He couldn't get off that subject for some reason.

"Yes. It was mandatory! Two victories for Zim so far today!" he declared, reminding Dib of the paper balls. "So quit your slobbering and accept that you've been beat!" Cackling madly, his lekku twitched happily, flicking forward as if taunting the boy.

Dib shivered and reached into his pocket, snapping some pictures of Zim when he wasn't looking. He put that back into his front pocket. Reaching into his other back pocket, for the purpose of nothing else I can think of (But it's Dib we're talking about, does he need a reason?), there were those handcuffs he had when he first met up with Zim. "I wonder if these really work," Dib asked himself aloud, and looked to the other suspiciously.

The click had him scowling--no matter the boy would get it in his sleep--but he stopped, frozen. Those...horrid handcuffs...! "Well..." Zim began, edging away, "...you'll never find out!" With that he bolted in the opposite direction of Dib. If there was only one thing Zim naturally had that was worth anything, was his speed. Within seconds he had sprinted down the length of the hallway, as he put his wig back on hastily.

"We'll see about that!" He yelled after him, copying Zim and darting after the other. Must... keep up... with the alien! The handcuffs held tightly in his hands, he nearly tripped over a dog. Why was a dog in the school? He could worry about that later, feeling the adrenaline rush through him. Ahh, the hunt was on. It was refreshing to get to chase an alien every so often.

Sharply turning a corner, he bulldozed through a crowd of students before bursting through the doors of the skool and skittering down the front steps. He glanced behind himself, not paying much mind before he heard a honk. Skidding to a halt, eyes moved up to see a truck barreling at him. The thing had too much momentum; it wouldn't be able to stop in time. Fake eyes widened to the point of the contacts almost falling out...


	2. Chapter 2

Dib followed feverishly after the alien, he was going to catch him no matter what! But as he ran down the steps, it only took about a second to realize that Zim would become an alien pancake in a matter of seconds. That is, if Dib didn't do anything. And, that is, if Dib would get moving already! So he wasn't too far behind, jumping over another motherfucking dog out of nowhere, and with his super awesome Dib powers he jumped. This caused him to run into Zim, tackling him out of the way. Well, at least he hoped so as he hit the ground. This would be played all in slow motion if it were on a show.

By some miraculous feat, they both skidded to the other side of the street; thank God they hadn't mended the streets to be bigger. Zim gave a few groans, lekku twitching slightly as his wig was partially off his head. As it still being skool-hours and a weekday there really wasn't anyone wandering outside the skool, save for the two on the sidewalk. Shaking his head, he let his elbows and forearms come down to support himself better and pushing up. The concrete was seriously hurting his Pa--what? What was this?

Zim had come almost literally face-to-face with Dib, two or three inches from the other. Oh, why did his brain decide to stop working now?

Dib's eyes were closed; he strained to open them to see Zim. Zim... really close. Well, this was awkward. He kind of just... was there for a moment, before his brain decided to talk to him to fill in the empty gap. 'Hate to interrupt, but if you haven't realized, you're really close to kissing that alien there.' Dib's eye twitched and he stared at Zim. It was some sort of staring contest, he preferred to think. Oh, how many things he would prefer to think. It was the most awkward staring contest he's ever been in, that's for sure.

And so the staring contest was under way. The memory chip in the alien's Pak was malfunctioning or something, because he couldn't FUCKING REMEMBER how to move...anything. At all. The only things that managed to move were his eyes, as they slid shut. Well what the fuck was he supposed to do now? Fucking memory chip...Gir probably replaced it with a muffin...or...something...

Dib blinked and smiled victoriously. "You lose, alien!" he said and looked off to the side for the handcuffs. Where did they go? 'To your right.' Dib looked to his left. 'No, dipshit, your other right.' As that joke grew even older, Dib stretched arm out to get the not so far away handcuffs, and snapped them on Zim's wrists. Finally, Zim was his! In a totally non-suggestive way…. Mhhmmm.

Fuck! Fuckfuckfuckfuckfu...ck...Oh...shiiiiit..."Woooow..." Lekku flickered softly, causing the wig to fall off as the antenna lay back against his head. "Soo...slow..." When did everything become so...odd? He felt like somebody hit the frame-by-frame button. Shit those things worked fast. Giving a small giggle, he leaned back onto the ground slightly, still minding his Pak even in the haze. "Hah...you fink...joo gotss meeh?" he asked in a slur, oblivious to said handcuffs causing this reaction. "Welllll..." He poked Dib's nose, grinning. "Noodle."

Dib's eye twitched at this, he looked down at Zim, still sitting by him. "Eh... Zim, I do have you. Handcuffs?" he suggested, holding up two of his own wrists as if an invisible pair were on him. He disregarded this quickly, and shook his head. 'Hehe, he looks like he's on drugs.'

Dib pulled Zim up by the cuffs. Okay, so he caught an alien. Now what? His only choice would to be to bring it back to his house, not wanting to linger around here for too long.

"C'mon." the human ordered, still holding onto the alien's wrist, tugging once to guide him.

Zim nodded, obeying but stumbled falling forward onto Dib instead. Fucking ground. The damn thing kept moving. Glaring at it half-heartedly he swore at it softly before leaning heavily on Dib. Giggling again for no apparent reason, he reached up on his tip-toes best he could before gnawing on the tip of the scythe lock. Even though it had grown, and Zim had grown, the lock wasn't long enough--it could never be the fact that Zim wasn't tall enough--to reach all the way down. So the only part that ended up in his mouth was the tip as he sucked on it happily.

Dib shivered. "Aw come on!" he exclaimed, wiggling around awkwardly. "I don't want more alien spit in my hair," he said, trying to lead Zim again, pulling both of his wrists now, and trying to keep him stable. It was probably hard, keeping somebody in a basically drunken state stable enough to walk. Let alone stop them from chewing on your hair. His mind wandered, and he wondered if the Irken's chewed/sucked on each other's antennae, or lekku for some reason. He didn't really want it to be for affection. 'Or do you? I bet you do.'

"Shut up," Dib mumbled to himself.

Zim let go of the lock, glaring at Dib before, once more but surely not the last time, breaking out in a fit of giggles. Trying his hardest not to tumble over onto himself or the Dib-human, he began walking along side Dib, although he leaned heavily for support. Otherwise he would just collapse where he (sort of) stood.

Yeah.

That wouldn't have been good. His lekku were getting a little cold but he didn't care...better than that stupid wig...ugh...

Dib heaved a sigh, letting the alien lean on him for support. He couldn't think of any other better way to help Zim walk, and this was only temporary. It didn't take long for them to get to his house; he wasn't too worried about being seen or anything. His dad was probably busy with work, and his sister was still at skool. They reached the front door; Dib pulled out a key and opened it, dragging Zim in the house.

Zim followed behind, looking at everything as if this was a completely different place. Oh God these handcuffs were quite the bitch. Giggling some more, he wiggled along, following quite close to Dib; a small fear gnawing at the back of his mind that something would jump out and eat him. Or...something like that...yeah.

Noodle.

That always made sense.

"This way," Dib lead Zim, half with his voice and half with just pulling him. He wondered if Zim would puke or something, the way he was acting. Funny, how nice he was being to his enemy and all. Well, he was a nice guy and it wouldn't be right to be a jerk to somebody who couldn't defend himself. 'Sure, whatever helps you sleep at night'. No, he wasn't going soft.

When they were in Dib's room, he shut the door for paranoid reasons and let Zim go, for him to wander freely around the room while he opened his laptop.

Zim, instead of wandering oh-so-gracefully and free like Dib had imagined, stumbled forward and landed on Dib's bed, giving a long drawn out sigh. Ah...so much better than concrete. Wiggling around despite the cuffs, he felt restless. But still calm. Peeling off the contacts as best he could with his cuffed hands, he threw them to the side. His eyes were large, ruby red and glassy. He stared, watching Dib hazily before stumbling over to him and, now able to get to the lock of hair, began chewing on it. This time with much less slobber.

"Will you stop that?" Dib complained halfheartedly, he was more intent on finding the cord that connected his camera to his computer. It was on the shelf, which is where he reached over and got it from. Plugging in the camera, he didn't want to sit back with Zim like that. So he eased his head down to the pillow, moving his hair carefully to lead Zim at the same time. Wait, why was he letting him chewing on his hair? 'You're going to have to get some good shampoo to fix all this damage on your hair.' his brain said sarcastically.

Zim glanced at the camera, with a sort of clicking in the back of his head. The camera was no good. Eeeviiil thing. Letting go of the scythe lock, watching it bounce back as if there'd never been any abuse in the first place, he leaned forward to stare at the small picture-taking device. Eeeeeeviiiiiiiilllllll!

But...he was far to slow to get the damn thing from Dib. Distraction...distraction...watching the human he eyed the fleshy "lekku" like things on the side of his head. Without warning or hesitation, he leaned over letting his tongue come out to lick at the shell of his ear, teeth moving to graze over it lightly. Must...distract...long...enough...!

Dib received a shiver down his spine and instinctively squirmed away. He looked utterly shocked and confused, blinking rapidly. That and he didn't want the saliva of an alien all over him. "What... wha... what?" Dib asked slowly, partially to Zim, partially to himself, hoping his brain could figure this behavior out. He felt a mental shrug and one eye narrowed at Zim. His weight was balanced on both of his elbows. "Is that part of some secret plan, Zim?" he asked.

"Nyuuu...testing..." Zim said, sounding drowsy as he leaned towards Dib some more before whispering huskily, "I'm seeing how sensitive these bits of flesh are...rather it seems...they need more testing, don't you think...?" Capturing the earlobe in his mouth, he clamped down to keep Dib in place without hurting him as he sucked at it much like he had done with the bit of hair that still waved by him tauntingly. Ah no...must resist! He needed to get that stupid camera.

Dib felt his cheeks heat up. So conf using right now, he didn't really hear what his brain was trying to say to him. Bits and pieces, bad reception. But... his brain wasn't a radio... Dib winced a little, he stared at Zim. "That's stupid, stop it," he said, his endless struggle to try and get away, was... still endless. Still very awkward, in a blink he could hear his brain again. 'There we go. Made some minor adjustments, looks like we're all good.'

Is my brain a radio?

'No.'

Zim smirked. It was working, yaaaay! Heaving a breathy sigh into Dib's ear, his tongue trailed away from the ear and along the jaw line, in the process moving closer to the camera and...Dib too. His lekku twitched forward, before leaning and brushing along the other's mock-lekku.

'So I guess you like this huh.'

Why! Why did all his other thoughts have to be clouded other than this one...?! Dib's eyes narrowed, he frowned deeply too. "Zim, your freakish alien ways will not stop me." he claimed, really not noticing Zim was closer to the camera now. 'Jeez, Dib, you sure seem easy. Swooning over your enemy.' his brain told him, Dib remained motionless for a second, until his hand placed itself on Zim's shoulder area, attempting to push him away.

So close...! But wait! Nooo! The Dib-human was pushing him away. Think...think...think...! Ack. Crap, damn these cuffs...! Willing to do anything to keep those pictures from going anywhere, he took Dib's hand in both his own, with a slight amount of difficulty, before staring at them. Without another thought, his serpentine tongue traveled out, winding around a finger before pulling it into his mouth sucking happily. All the while moving forward and a little more towards the camera. If he hadn't been wearing these cuffs, he could easily dive and get the thing. But no. He had to have these damn things slowing him down...only one choice. Get closer to it...

Dib was oblivious to the fact that Zim wanted the camera still. His brain seemed to laugh at him, as his cheeks were probably a quite visible reddish color by now.

'Think, Dib.'

I can't!

He frowned at this, terribly confused. Zim, his enemy! Whyyy!

'Dib.'

What!

'The camera.'

I don't care about the camera! He pushed his own thoughts away, still not getting it, and his motor skills still succeeded to fail him. That sounds funny...

Zim couldn't help but enjoy this a little bit, watching Dib squirm like he did. Ooh...it was sooo funny. If he got out of this, he'd have to remember that his fingers seemed to be a weak spot. And his...ears, they called 'em. Yeah. Ah, the pleasures of known weaknesses. Opening his mouth and pulling the finger out, he did not stop his treatment as he let his tongue lick at the underside. Ack...kinda salty...made him wanna chew once more on that Lekku the Dib-worm had. But again, he had to resist the tempting piece of hair.

Dib squirmed and tried to pull his finger away, he wiggled around and ignored his brain calling him an idiot. Zim's tongue felt funny.

'Glad you decided to think that. Go ahead and fill me with useless fantasies about other places you want Zim's tongue--'

Dib yelled out to stop his brain from finishing that sentence. He closed his eyes tightly, gritting his teeth. Must... get... senses together...

Zim made a bigger scooch towards the camera, giving a long hard suck on the finger before letting it go. But no, the abuse continued. He pulled in two other fingers, the point of his tongue tracing along the fingers with contentment. Ooh...shit it was hard to...fight...! Gah. No use. Without warning, the Irk let loose a low purr, rumbling in his chest as ruby eyes slipped closed from the world, sucking lightly and nibbling at the tips gently.

'Oh, don't give me that look. You can handle this yourself. Besides, it's funny.' Dib shivered all over.

"Ziiiim, stop it," he said pathetically weak, and wished his poor fingers could escape and his face would return to its normal color. But no, the alien had to taunt him. The part that really bugged him is that Zim probably didn't know that all these things were making him question himself, the very being of himself and all he knew and believed in!

'Don't worry, I'm not homophobic.' his brain told him. Dib shook his head. It was the fact that Zim was an alien after all...

"But Dib," the invader purred softly, still rather hazy from the handcuffs. "You seem to be enjoying this immensely...why stop a good thing...?" Letting his hand fall, Zim moved forward drawing the boy forward. Letting his hands wander over to the camera, he began to fiddle with the cord attaching it to the computer, while he let his face get extremely close to Dib's. The oh-so infamous tongue licked at his own lips before slithering back inside his mouth. Moving so close, to the point of lips touching, Zim said in almost less than a whisper, "I can tell you want it Dib..."

'Ooh, what a charmer.' Dib shook his head frantically and his eyes shut. "No! Alien!!" Dib said quickly. His face was beet red now and he squirmed around. "I won't fall for your... your alien tricks," he insisted, shivering a bit now and opening one eye to stare at Zim. "You won't fool me!"

'Ah, but he has already.' He still didn't understand what his brain was implying here. Oh well. The fact that Zim was almost kissing him and how awkward this was, was only halted for a moment there. Really, Zim must have had something up his sleeve here. He knew it was the handcuffs, but... still!

Fiddle...fiddle...fiiiiiiddddlllleeeee...BINGO. Abruptly Zim pulled back, waving said camera and smirking hazily before, without caring, smashing the damn thing on Dib's floor. Crushing it under his boot, he scooched onto the bed again and lay down, comfortable enough as he Pak sunk slightly into the mattress. "Three wins for Zim today, Dibbers." Zim replied, looking smug with that Don't-you-wish-you-could-win-once? look.

Dib sat up and was in awe, his camera was on the floor... along with all his pictures. Nuuu... nuuuu! Dib's eye twitched violently. "How could you! All the evidence... all of it!!" he cried out, jumping off his bed and sadly trying to piece it back together. This made him regain his normal state and he glared at Zim. Jumping onto his bed, he took the laptop and huddled into a secluded corner of his room, typing frantically. Sadly, all the information the camera should have been transferring was lost.

'What a shame. Maybe you can ask him to make out now.' Dib ignored his brain, which had grown a weird personality to it lately. He kept his eyes on Zim most of the time...

The fucking handcuffs were making him wanna pass out, even though he didn't normally feel tired at all. Oh fuck. He could feel it. "...cactus...noodle...paperclip..." he muttered. His eyes were even more glassy than usual, his lids fluttering before they became too heavy closing shut. They twitched, as he tried so damn desperately to stay awake but to no avail. Everything went muffled as he began drifting off.

Dib nodded to himself, he was somewhat relieved and pleased the handcuffs were working. Finishing up what he was doing, he closed the laptop and ran a hand through his hair. Bad idea, it was all matted in places from the spit. Shuddering, Dib thought frantically. He tried calling the Swollen Eyeball, but he should have known by now--all these years they still don't answer his calls. In a depressed state, Dib took out some equpiment to conduct minor tests on Zim with. A laser scanner, to see what kind of organs he had. Next... blood sample! Dib's brain was silent, observing how he did things.

Noo...fuck fuck fuck fuck! He needed to stay awake...

"nnnggg..." he gave a quiet moan, irritated with himself. Lekku twitched forward and backward forward and backward. Even though his whole body felt heavy, keeping his Lekku moving helped keep him awake. Oh, he swore to his Tallest that when he got out of these things... Dear Tallest these things were gonna pay.

Dib nodded to himself, saving the samples in a drawer. A secrety secret drawer... that only he knew of! It was really just a regular looking drawer. On his dresser. With a lock. Which only he had the key to. Dib was too paranoid.

'You moron!' Dib's brain screamed at him, as the teen took off the handcuffs off Zim, seeing no real use for them now. He put them under his bed for later use.

Crash. Woah that was some TRIPPY ASS SHIT. Zim immediately perked up, but continued to lay flat and look hazy. Observing Dib through lidded eyes, the Irken was curious as to just how far he could push his limits while he thought he was still influenced by the stupid handcuffs. Oh, they were under this bed, and they WOULD pay. Gathering himself and trying not to laugh, Zim let loose a long, low whine, making grabby hands at Dib. "Gimme..." he slurred slightly, eyes looking hazy.

Dib frowned and turned to Zim. "Give you what?" he asked, blinking and resisting to comb out his hair . His eyes darted around the room for a moment, in search of one in plain sight, but there was none.

'He waaaaaants you.' the brain laughed. Dib rolled his eyes. It was the handcuffs. Stupid handcuffs... making Zim all... weird. Remembering the things that happened made it really awkward, at least for him. Maybe Zim wouldn't remember. Yeah! He wouldn't remember, and this would never be brought up again. Yeah...

Zim stared hard, still trying to look hazy. It was working well enough, thanks to Dib and his not-smart-ness. More fiercely, but still trying to act influenced, he made the motions with his claws again. "Diiiiiiiiib-thiiiiiiiiiiing..." he whined, pouting. "Giiiiimmmmmeeeee...!" He was disappointed when the boy didn't start moving quick enough for his liking.

Dib frowned and stepped forward hesitantly. What could he possibly want? 'Your hair maybe.' Oh, that's right. He looked at Zim, an intense stare while pointing to the extension of his hair questionably.

"This?" Dib asked.

'Really, you should ask him why he chews on your hair like that. I bet it's some sort of deep psychological meaning.' the brain mused.

Oh...Oh God the lekku. Soo...damn...tempting...! No! No, no..not it...Zim gave another whine, shaking his head fiercely. His own lekku stayed slack, so they moved with his head violently. "Gimme joos..." he purred out, blinking large, ruby red eyes up at the poor confused earthling. Nobody could resist the large red eyes of awesomeness.

"You... want... what?" Dib asked, trying to look away from Zim's eyes. Man it was hard to concentrate when looking at the shiny-ness of the alien's eyes.

'Be alert.' Dib frowned more. He could hold the world record for frowning so many times in one day. He leaned in sort of as to listen to Zim's words better.

Fuck it. Shooting forward, he grabbed Dib, pulling him down to land on the bed next to him. Going back into the dreamy state like nothing had happened at all, the Irken snuggled up to Dib's chest. Oh... oh...so so warmm...! Loud purrs rumbled in his throat and chest, reverberating all over the place.

Letting out a surprised yell, his arms scrambled all over the place at first. "Jesus Christ," Dib muttered. "When will the effects wear off? I can't have a delusional alien in my house all night." He poked at Zim's head, his hand toying with the Irken's lekku.

'How fucking sweet. Let's take a picture.' Dib angrily pushed his brain's thoughts away, realizing how sappy this was and breathed in heavily, so the other's green head rose then fell with his chest.

Yes... now... heeekklkmmmdfksdfjadgfaldkfja;dlfj. Scramble. Oh Tallest...Lekku...being touched. Immidetly he fell slack, no longer pretending, as his tongue lolled out of his mouth. Soft purrs and groans escaped now and again, occasionally a keen too. "...m-mufffiinnnggglll..." he slurred horribly, eyes rolling into the back of his head. Holy mother of--! Never had he had his Lekku touched... it was...soo good...ohhh man...

Dib blinked. Holy shit, whatdidIdowhatdidIdowhatdidIdo?

'Antennae. Lekku. He obviously likes that. Do it again.' the brain snickered. Dib did as his brain told him, and twirled his fingers around them. Suddenly, a crazy idea hit. It was so crazy that his brain thought he was crazy. Yeah. Dib's eyes were curious as he leaned his head out, nibbling on the tip of one of Zim's lekku. Why was he doing this again?

'Because I'm your brain. I tell you what to do.' Oh yeah.

"Ahhhhh...nnnnshiiiiit..." Strings of moans, curses, and loud purring emitted from the now very lackadaisical Irken as shocks of pleasure ran down his spine settling in his squeedlyspooch and twisting it in uncomfortable but unbelievable ways. Ah. Oh shit, the tiiiips. He could already smell the hormones his lekku gave off...that liquid it gave off on the tips...oh God...wait. He didn't believe in such nonsense. But...yeah he was fucked. He couldn't really care right now as he gave some more moans and curses, occasionally mixing Dib's name in there.

His brain was in as much shock as he was in. 'Uh... So. You've managed to make your enemy totally aroused. Good job, Dib.' Sometimes he hated his brain, and this was one of his times. He tasted something funny, and licked at it again. Just to test it, you know. Testing. He shivered, an eerie feeling about how much power he had over Zim at this moment, for just... playing with his lekku.

He could feel his squeedlyspooch tightening, as shivers began wracking his body. Oh hell...he couldn't feel anything but the mouth on his lekku tip. It felt so abused but jeeze, he couldn't have it stopped even if he wanted it. Leaning up, he practically knocked Dib's lips away from his Lekku, kissing him while upside-down. It was a little awkward, but that sent his spooch swirling even more. Yay...!

Dib was shocked, had just the simple actions of that caused Zim to do such a thing?

'Duh.'

Weirdweirdweird, this is really weird... and still, Dib didn't do anything to stop Zim.

'Put this in your diary, Dib. Your first kiss is by an alien, upside-down.' the brain laughed. Dib twitched at this, one hand continued to play with the lekku, the other just... laying limp there.

So good...but his lekku was already raw as hell. Freeing the one Dib had been playing with, he slipped the untouched one into Dib's fingers before giving a sort of mewl as it was stroked and played with. Ohh...yay...bliss! Eyeing Dib's other hand, he grabbed it and guided it up his shirt, moving his hand around a bit trying to get him used to it. After that, Zim let his hand reach around a bit uncomfortably but he didn't care, letting claws rake over the cloth of his still covered stomach.

Dib's face was a tomato. No really. It was probably that red. "Z-Zim," he stuttered, he could hear his brain snickering.

'Go ahead Dib, he's under your control now. Do whatever you please.' his brain said tauntingly, Dib shakily felt around under the alien 's shirt, he closed his eyes tightly now.

'Scared?' he was shaking a bit now, and opened his eyes a crack.

"Mmmmhmmm..." he groaned. Nothing was right anymore. That's wasn't bothering Zim in the least bit. He could feel everything lurching, heat gathering and pooling in his squeedlyspooch as the world topsy-turvyed. Oh this was all too much, so much stimulation all at once for the inexperienced Irken. His own face flushed, but not red like Dib's. Instead it seemed to be a light blue, the shade growing a bit darker. Wiggling his claws underneath the shirt hem, he ran them ever-so-gently across Dib's waistline.

Dib's eyes closed again. Nonono. This wasn't happening. It was all a dream. Yep, a dream in... wait, since when did he dream about Zim like this?! Still in denial, his brain chuckled.

'Well well. I'm afraid to stop talking to you, you might do something stupid.' it laughed again. Dib's shaking hands did their jobs, the one under the shirt looking for nothing in particular as it roamed awkwardly around. Heehee.

If this was a dream, then shit, he'd have to fall asleep more often! The more abused lekku leaned flat against his head while the other twitched thoroughly enjoying the attention. Breath coming in small pants, his clawed fingers moved along the hem of the other's pants. Nothing was clear to Zim. They slipped down slightly, before running over some of the coarse hair...


End file.
